It’s hard to believe you can so easily strip someone from your life but yet still be plagued by the memories stitched into every piece of your being. Bare bone and still breathing.
I felt a certain sense of relief after hitting delete. Releif in the fact I still had the strength to do what needed to be done. It wasn’t about how I felt anymore, it was about surviving and taking those first few steps to letting go of the past, on my own.
All our messages, all of my favorite things you used to say, gone. The ones I could spend hours going back over, reading and re-reading, again and again. It’s been so long since you said these things, the memory of how they made me feel had disolved long ago, anyway.
I could feel you fading. It’s something that could make a person go mad. The only thing left of you was my memories. And even those were failing me.
Were your eyes blue? Or were they green? Were you really as tall as I remember?
Were you even there at all? Or is this my mind betraying me?