This really helped me figure out a few things about myself that I’ve been chasing for awhile.
I think the reason most people are in relationships is to not feel alone. You get to experience things with a partner and love each other and stuff. Plus sex.
At least, I think the reason I am somewhat willfully single is that I don’t want to feel alone–and I feel more alone in a relationship than I feel being single.
In one relationship I was at a bad place with my anxiety and I hadn’t figured out how to deal with it yet. I would tell him I was having anxiety and he would say “it’s okay, just relax.” That is not how anxiety works, you can’t turn off the faucet. But I sat next to him, internally miles away, trying to work out all the things I was anxious about. I couldn’t bring it up again because he’d dismissed it with an easy/impossible solution. I knew he had…
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